Rise. Come Alive. Awaken. Shine
These are a couple of words that the Lord has been speaking to me as He prepares to take me back to Thailand. As He prepares to take me back to Pattaya- aka the ‘sex tourism capitol of the world’ aka ‘modern day Sodom & Gomorrah’. As I spend time with Jesus asking Him to get me ready, He continuously tells me “don’t be afraid to shine”. don’t be afraid to step fully into your passion and purpose. don’t be afraid to confidently walk in your authority. don’t be afraid to live in the truth of your identity. don’t be afraid to stand out. don’t be afraid to embrace your uniqueness. don’t be afraid to love deeply & intensely. do not be afraid to s h i n e. its what you were created to do.
“see us rising from a distance. there’s no darkness that could dim us”
He’s teaching me to not be scared to open my heart up again and love deeply, fiercely, and dangerously. Not to be frightened to let Him make me new. Even though its uncomfortable and intimidating. Not to be afraid to go to the hard places from my past and work through them- because He is after those places too. Even though I’d rather have nothing to do with them- God wants to use those parts of my past to make me new. He doesn’t throw anything away- He uses everything. He makes all things new. He doesn’t throw away the old and dirty and start from scratch, He takes my mess and joyfully makes me new. He renews, restores, refurbishes- using my wounded and dirty and tainted past. He takes us – all the labels, brokenness, & failures and remakes us. taking us from glory to glory.
He is showing me that I can be all the things He created me to be- all at once because Jesus loves who I am. He is giving me new confidence to be the unique, passionate, lovable, joyful, purposeful, bright daughter that he created me to be.
A couple of nights ago I went to a concert and the speaker (shout out to Christine Cain) spoke some real good stuff. She talked about the first two questions that God asked His creation in Genesis. The first question God asked mankind was “where are you” and not in the sense of location, but in the sense of: my child, my perfect, beautiful, passionate, lively child that I love- where is that child, where ARE you? Where did that child go that was just a second ago living in perfect communion with me and is now hiding in fear and shame? wake up, where are you? wheres the YOU I created you to be? The second question God asked was “who told you?” who told you, you were naked. Who told you were useless? who told you you were unlovable? who told you you weren’t worth it. WHO told you these lies and why have you believed them. As if this hadn’t hit me enough she began to tell a story of her daughter. She explained that her husband always told her daughter “you are intelligent, and courageous, and beautiful”. On her daughters first day of kindergarten, a student told her that she was dumb and ugly, and the daughter stood up, put her shoulders back, and replied “no I’m not- my daddy says I’m smart and I’m beautiful”. Goshhhhh. and I heard God saying- ‘Julianne, where are you. wheres the unique, confident, passionate, lovable, joyful daughter I created you to be. Why are you trying to hide and blend in? Why aren’t you embracing how I’ve created you? Why have you taken on the labels others have given you and ignored the ones I gave to you at birth? Even when you were being formed I knew your life had purpose. I knew you would shine. I called you beautiful and wonderful. why are you afraid to be all those things? and who told the lies that you were anything other than what I have said you are. why my love, would you believe someone else and not your Father? rise up. come alive. awaken. shine. do not be afraid my dear.”
Hes teaching me to not be afraid to shine bright, loud and proud. Not trying to fit in and dim the glow in order to please people, just confidently being His. Knowing that I am one of His bright ones, that I have purpose and power in the Kingdom. So what does it look to step fully into my purpose. What does it look like to love deeper than most are used to? What does it look like to walk unwavering in my identity. and what does it look like to confidently shine in the ‘sex tourism capitol of the world’? what does it look to live knowing that I will always shine, & that there’s nothing the world can do to dim the glow- its simply what God created me to do. I think it means to finally fully come alive. to fully live- not because of what I do, but because I know who I am. and walking in the identity and anointing that God put on my life from the beginning- i think thats what fully living really is all about. It’s about shamelessly shining.
“I ride the dawn, its the name I was given. can’t get away from the meaning- I’ll always rise, I’ll always shine. In a blackout- I will illuminate the dark. You WONT escape the beaming. I will glimmer I will glow. Light of the world- its the name we’ve been given- cant get away from the vision- we are cities on a hill” -Steffany Gretzinger