May 2017 – J’s Journey

ten.

I am officially in my tenth and final week of outreach. It has been a crazy ride, backpacking in seven different countries including: Cyprus, Colombia, Mexico, Canada, and England. I have seen God move in miraculous ways from people being healed at malls and coffee shops, to refugees being saved at a sports event. Throughout this incredible adventure I have learned so many things and God has really revealed so much to me! I thought I would celebrate our tenth week of outreach with ten things I have learned in this time.

God takes care of His children.

Just a couple hours upon arriving to our first destination (Cyprus) we opened an envelope basically telling us we were going to a country called Cyprus, we have one contact, and a place to stay for two nights. From there we needed to seek God and see what we were to do. This really threw me into my reality for the next 2 and a half months. This was going to be my life and it freaked me out alittle bit, but God is SO faithful and took complete care of us. We got connections the morning after we got there because we felt God was telling us to go to a local church first thing in the morning. There we met a team on outreach from a base in Scotland. We also found out that day that the one email given to us was the wrong email and we knew we had to be out of the hotel the next day. None of this shook us however because God provided all we needed that next day; a place to lay our heads for the next two weeks and many solid contacts. From then on we had days packed with fruit filled ministry. I truly learned how to fully rely on Jesus and I´m never going back to being worried and scared that He won´t take care of me.

2. God loves to give His kids good things.

I think this has been one of the biggest lessons our team has learned on outreach: the art of receiving. God has blessed us immensely throughout outreach. He has taken my team places that I could have never imagined: Mediterranean Sea, Andes Mts, Caribbean Sea, Rocky Mts, and Niagara Falls! Not only were we blessed to see these amazing landscapes, but we had the privilege to declare God´s goodness and light over them. God blessed us with great living conditions, food on every plate, showers, and even the little things like getting a row to our selves on long plane rides. We went through the struggle of feeling guilty for these things because we are on outreach and we were fooled that that means roughin´ it. Don´t get me wrong, we had our rough times, but we really learned just receive the blessings God gives us because He loves us and wants to give us good things, He loves giving us gifts.

3. Evangelism, prayer, and intercession can be so fun!

I have really learned that evangelism has a bad rep. When you hear it, it just does not honestly sound pleasant, but God has completely changed my heart on it. Evangelism is simple, its the life followers of Jesus are called to do everyday: love, encourage, pray, and spread the simple life changing gospel to His people! This is the life I should be living everyday and I think I really have learned to do so. I have also really seen the power of prayer and intercession. It is so fun because you can do it anywhere. Whether you are in a coffee shop or road tripping for days in a car, you have the power to really make an impact in someone´s day. I absolutely love just sitting somewhere public and asking God to highlight and give me a word for someone. Then I just get to go up to them and encourage them with what God is telling me! Most people are so touched that they are on God´s heart. I also have loved getting to intercede for people at home and just partner with what God is doing in their life! It is crazy that we have this ability right inside us to touch others´ life, wherever we may be, whatever we may be doing!!

4. Going without a phone for some time isn´t all that bad.

One of our first days in Colombia my phone was stolen out of my pocket and I went six weeks with no phone, no music, and no camera. It really sucked for the first couple weeks, the 6,000 pictures I had on that phone were gone and for those who know me pretty well, I loveeee taking pictures and capturing memories. However I found that instead of spending my spare moments scrolling on social media, I found myself talking to Jesus and reading the Bible. Throughout this time of being disconnected with what was happening in the world, I became more connected with Jesus. I found that He is really all I need. HE is all I need, HE will sustain me.

5. One can certainly live off three shirts for ten weeks.

I have spent most of outreach wearing the same three shirts, they are great, and I have learned to appreciate them very much! I have really experienced that I do not need nearly as much as I thought I did. I may wear the same outfit for four days straight, but with some sink laundry and lots of deodarent, it really isn´t all that bad. If anything I think I might enjoy having three shirts rather than ten. Its so simple. Before I left, many people advised me to pack less than I thought I would need and it was probably one of the best pieces of advice I´ve received. I also learned that practical is better in the sense of outreach. I have two articles of clothing that have really saved me: my poncho and my buff. Both can be used for countless purposes. SO GOOD!

6. You need to know who you are before where you are going.

God has taught me so much about who I am in Him. That no matter where I am, I am hidden in Him, I belong to Him, and nothing can change that. I think for the first time I really know my value and worth. I know what the King says about me and that is all that matters. I may not know where I am going or how I am gonna get there but my identity in Jesus is solid and that is what will keep me grounded.

7. Discovering the secret of a true servants heart.

I asked God at the beginning of outreach to really give me His servant´s heart so I can serve for the right reasons and for the right person, so that my motives are correct. I learned very quickly that a true servant´s heart (at least for me) needs to be genuinely okay with doing anything, with doing the dirty work. Being willing to do the stuff no one wants to do is so valuable to God and with that willing heart He has actually has not given me that many dirty jobs, I´ve actually truly enjoyed all the work I have done for Him whether it be pulling an endless amount of weeds in a garden or painting for a church for twelve hours straight. I have seen God really honor the willing hearts of everyone on my team.

8. Ask and you shall receive.

WOW did I see God´s faithfulness in this outreach or what. When we found out what country we were going to go to, one of the first things I did was ask God to give me His heart for the place, and I was surprised with how much love He gave me for (most) of the countries! I will not lie, I was not exactly excited to go back to North America, and the States in particular, but with each country I found it harder and harder to leave because I grew such a love for the place, the people, and the ministry.

9. Being an introvert is not an excuse.

I learned this lesson real quick. I am a hardcore introvert and sometimes ministry is hard for me because more times than not it is centered around making relationships and connections with people which involves ALOT of conversation with ALOT of different people, and usually I am the one initiating it. It can be very exhausting always being with so many people, but I have learned that I cannot run from these moments just because I do not want to be around people, or because it intimidates me, I need to power through for the sake of their souls, so they can encounter God´s perfect love. It has really been a journey of laying down my right to my introvertness.

10. Rest days are more than necessary.

This may have been one of the biggest things I learned on outreach. Having days off to rest, process, and rejuvenate are so vital to make sure I do not over extend myself. These are the days I find it appropriate to run off and spend the day alone with God going over what happened during the week and just letting Him fill me up. He has also shown me that I need to stop trying to operate in my own strength because after ten straight weeks of backpacking, I physically am not capable to do it on my own; causing me to completely rely on God to strengthen me, and it´s great because He always does. These days off are nice, although I never truly have an off day and I do not want to because I always want to be open to what God is saying, what He wants me to do, and who He wants me to talk to. It is an exciting life.

I could continue for hours on things I have learned during these last ten weeks. They have been the most adventurous, scary, fun, uncomfortable, exciting, challenging, and life changing weeks of my life.

THANK YOU JESUS

fight

“There is hope, it is not too far gone” are the words I hear God speaking to me over and over again throughout the past 9 weeks. I am not too far gone, my family is not too far gone, my circumstance is not too far gone. There is hope. I have believed a lie for so long that my circumstance is too far gone and there is no hope. That I had to accept things as they were, that there was no way things could be fixed, could get better. Not a chance that my family could be restored. I learned to settle, to give up and be okay with an unhealthy home life. I thought, there is no chance that God could heal it, theres been too much hurt and too much trust broken, to ever be able to truly feel welcomed and loved there. I put God in a box, I believed a lie about Him for most of my life, that He is not big enough to fix my family, that its too huge of a task, that there is no hope. It NEVER crossed my mind until about two months ago that God could actually restore and heal these deep issues. That things could actually change, that love could fill my family again, that the pain from the past no longer has to define us. I became mad at the enemy for what he has taken from me, how he has led me to belive my entire life that God could not work a miracle, which led me to giving up on all hope. Mad that satan thinks he has complete control over my family. Well newsflash he doesn’t and now I know that.

Now it’s time to fight. Fight for healing, fight for freedom, fight for restoration. My weapon is prayer and I am learning to pray intensely and diligently, fighting the spiritual war that has taken hold of my family for too long. God wants to heal and restore me and my family and He wants my help in that. He is tearing down the lies that there is no hope for this family and showing me that all things are possible with Him. There’s no amount of untruth that can separate us.

“In this world you will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world” John 16:33

If you are reading this and are in a situation that seems hopeless, be assured and encouraged that NOTHING is impossible for Jesus. He can heal, fix, and mend anything and everything. We have a God who is bigger than the hurt, the scars, and the past. We need to magnify Him until the He is the biggest thing we see. He is our hope. He is the answer. He will fight for us.

faithfulness

can´t get enough, can´t get enough of your presence

can´t get enough, can´t get enough of your goodness Jesus

When we found out (in the airport) that we were going to Cancun Mexico, I am not gonna lie, I was not completely excited. First, I did not particularly want to go to Mexico, I live 2 hours from the border and I could really go whenever I wanted to (even though I never had before), and second, I was feeling pretty done with going to touristy places and cities. What I love is remote villages where I get to love on children, pray with families and experience the culture. That is the ministry I particularly enjoy. Do not get me wrong I absolutely love the ministry we have been doing for the past five weeks: street worship, evangelism, intercession etc, but my soul was longing for more: to reach more people, to see more culture, to experience more new things.

Every country we have gone to, we are given maybe one or two contacts, but every single one in every single country has fallen through, so we have resorted to finding our own contacts, or simply doing our own ministry which looks a lot like what I mentioned above (street worship, evangelism, intercession etc). We have no doubt seen God move in mighty ways during this type of ministry, but it is so draining organizing it every day with limited opportunities. So when we found out we were going to Cancun, I began asking God to give us contacts, ministry, program, anything, and the rad thing is that He knows me heart and my desires so well, because He gave them to me, and He loves to give His children the desires of their heart.

This week we showed up to Mexico with no contacts and no ministry, but God is so faithful; He literally sweeps me off my feet with surprises. We got in touch with YWAM Cancun and the very first day we got here we met up with them. We had some fellowship as they took us in with all the love we could ever imagine. They generously offered to let us join their ministry, which, what would you guess it was? Loving on kids in a remote village while praying for the families and experiencing the culture. yep, EXACTLY what had been on my heart. I did not even dare ask God for that before, He just knows my heart so well and He excitedly trusted me with this ministry. It was a dream literally, and it was even cooler to see how language barrier is not a an actual barrier at all when you have the Creator of languages with you! Seriously so dang cool. This week has been fillledddddd with ministry left, right, and center, which was what our team had been longing for. We have done some pretty new and exciting things that opened our eyes to a whole new way of life.

We unfortunately only have a short time here in Cancun and I am surprisingly sad to leave. If you would have asked me on Monday if it would be hard for me to leave Mexico I would have looked at you with a weird face and laughed because I did not expect to like it here, let alone fall in love with this place and these people, but I did, and in such a short amount of time. I asked God to give me a heart for this place, and He did more than I expected (per usual). He gave me His heart for this place and these people and has made it hard for me to leave; in the best way. So I will leave Mexico leaving a part of my heart here, waiting expectantly for God to give me a heart for the next country we go to, whatever it may be. His goodness and faithfulness is so great I cannot comprehend it.

He is so good

He is so faithful

I can´t get enough

Dare

“Then Jesus said to His disciples, ´Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it but whoever loses their life for me will find it” Matthew 16:24-25

Outreach is half way over and my time here in Colombia is quickly drawing to a close. If God has taught me one thing during this time, it would be the beauty of giving up my rights and dying to my flesh daily. I thought I knew what all of this meant , but God has shown me something much deeper. The last five weeks have shown me what picking up my cross and denying myself actually looks like.

One huge way God has been gently revealing this truth to me is showing me that my time is not my own. After leaving Cyprus, we had a long layover in Germany and naturally I was ecstatic to finally get some alone time. I bought a coffee and started journalling and reading my Bible. I was spending some quality time with Jesus when a man sits farther down the table. I had asked God earlier that week to provide divine appointments with people while I was traveling. Everything in me screamed ´talk to him, just say something, anything´. Remembering what I had asked God for earlier I struck up a conversation with the man. What started off as a shallow conversation about the coffee ended with Him accepting Jesus as Lord! WHAT?! God is so good! This man was so interested about my story and things God has revealed to me. I got to share my testimony and how God has healed me, made me whole, and set me free through love. I shared the pain, the hurt, and the reality of my past but it quickly led to how God has made beauty from my brokenness. So no, I did not get the quiet time my flesh longed for, but my spirit was more than satisfied that a soul found Jesus´redemptive and personal love. So whether it be at an airport trying to get some alone time, or at the grocery just trying to quickly buy some food; I will be open to the Spirit interrupting my schedule for His glory.

The Lord is also teaching me how to rise above my fleshy emotions by choosing not to participate in them. Sounds pretty weird but its legit. My third day in Colombia, my phone was stolen out of my pocket. Huge bummer. Naturally I was upset, frustrated, confused, and annoyed. I got a new phone shipped to my address in Colombia but because of corruption and a ban on phones entering the country we have still yet to obtain the phone. It´s been sitting at the fed ex 30 minutes away for 3 weeks and every time we try to get it, they come up with another excuse why we cannot have it. So now I will be flying to a random country with no phone. Because I am human I have felt completely frustrated throughout this situation, but God has shown me that I cannot stay there. I cannot sit in my frustration and shut down. Theres work to be done, people to be told the truth that Jesus loves them. I have learned that because I am in this world it is natural to feel these emotions, but because I am not of this world I have a higher calling to rise above and not let my fleshly issues affect my ministry. Its crazy that the moment I give it to God, He shows up in the most awesome ways and I am not distracted or held down by it anymore, being able to focus on the task at hand.

Something else of the flesh I have been struggling with is weariness. Naturally after doing constant ministry and traveling for five weeks my body becomes tired. One day in Cartagena we were doing some mall evangelism and I was not feeling it. I was tired after a day of traveling, I was sweaty because of the humidity and I did not want to participate. That´s when God reminded me that I have a choice, I can operate in my fleshly strength or I can operate in His perfect strength. Right after I decided to rely on His strength and refreshment we saw Him move in incredible ways. We prayed for a lady who had a back and knee brace and watched tears stream down her face as God healed her body and completely took away her pain. It was the most beautiful sight. It´s crazy how giving up my right to these crazy emotions actually sets me free!

One right that I have to continuously give up is my right to comfort. Comfort on all levels, from my living and sleeping conditions to spontaneously being asked to host a church service. With our time in Colombia, God has challenged me to minister with the people here whether I have a translator or not. It is not the most comfortable thing to go up to someone knowing about 15 words in their language asking if you can pray for them, but God shows up each time whether I know what they are saying to me or not. We once had about a 20 minute notice that we were going to be hosting most of a church service. It is not the most comfortable thing to sit through worship and have God tell you to stand up and give a word to the people about personal things God has healed me from, but again so many people encountered God after I shared what God had shared with me for the people. One by one they came up to me after the service asking for prayer, I had no idea what they wanted prayer for but I felt God´s heart for each and every one of them. When I give up my right to feel comfortable I give room for God to move through me to His people.

We have a higher calling than just living the human life and settling for these rights and emotions. There is so much more freedom when you lay them down and are not hindered by the baggage they entail. When you dare to step into your higher calling, God can use you for amazing glory in His Kingdom.

It´s my J O Y to lay it down, I give it all to you.